While playing, I give in the the energy high/low of winning/losing.
I love the game.
I love when the combination of pieces on the board coordinate nicely.
I enjoy seeing my rating go high.
When my rating is low, I strive hard to bring it high.
I identify myself with the rating.
I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to participate in all of these.
When the desire comes to play online chess, I breath and take a stand not to participate.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into and become possessed by the experience of winning / loosing.
ReplyDeleteI forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to enjoy the combination of pieces on the board to such an extend that I would want to see them over and over again as I derive pleasure from the sequences and patterns.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I am hypnotized by the sequences and patterns as an energy of pleasure within myself.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to identify myself with the rating of the scores making me feel more or making me feel less according to the score that I have.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed a score to determine how I experience myself.
When and as I am playing chess - I look within myself and make sure that I am not being directly by thoughts or energy as experiences; instead I remain here constant in playing the game.
Thanks Esteni for putting them out all the associations.
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